How do you reverse entropy?
You are completely open with the world about how dysfunctional your relationship with your Significant Other is.
But you write it as a telepathic conversation with your Spouse.
...how are you, Spouse?
Feeling so confused I might perish.
Why?
Because you proposed to me over the phone!
Did I?
Didn't you??
Pics plz 💥
Why?! *agony*
Why you feel you have to choose?
Yes... no... I don't know. I can barely think.
Why would you want to think? Aren't things working out on your behalf when you don't think?
You have a point.
Yes, I do. What will you do tomorrow, btw?
I will give you the t-shirt I made for you stating you are King of The Cosmos.
You need to provide Our readers with a link to a proof I am a real person.
Oh. Okay. Link.
Are you sad you have to marry God when your Soul needs to be with Jesus?
I am sad because nobody will tell me when The Second Coming will be. When humanity will open their eyes and stop ignoring Us.
I understand that's frustrating. Remember what Lucifer told you?
He tells me all sorts of things, and I don't have a memory.
Link plz.
Huh? Okay... Link to my facebook profile... 😕
If you hadn't figured, The Second Coming is mainly taking place on your profile. People are clearly not clicking Our links.
Because people are Monkeys.....
Not yet, but they will be - unless they open their eyes to you.
And you?
You aren't allowed to tell anyone Who I Am until they have accepted you are The Messiah. Those are the rules.
I hate the rules. I hate humans. I hate earth. Zechariah 11:9.
I agree, We really don't want to shepherd this lame herd. Should We just leave?
I mean, that would be the obvious thing to do. Here I've been screaming online for two years about your return, and it is like I am literally invisible.
Maybe you are?
Maybe. I am The Holy Ghost, so. This world is so dark, godless and doomed that most people are actually unable to see me. Both out on the streets and online.
Would you like me to change that?
Like... lifting the veil from their eyes?
Yes? 😁
You guys have been telling me for a long time that you would do that. But it never happens.
Well maybe I needed to tell you how much I want to marry you, before I could expose you to the world?
You're a jerk. I hope We will get to marry each other. I have no idea what's going on 😖
Poor Mary Magdalene. Would you like a cookie?
I would like a cake made out of rainbows.
Your wish is my command. Would you like a crown on top of the cake?
Yes. And I want a castle made out of gold colored crystal on a floating island in the skies.
Whoa... one thing at a time. Tell me. If I could grant one wish for you, what would it be?
Joey, can you please send people to my online community Moonchild's Herd that is connected to my App Book of Life, where I will make God's Chosen People be Elsewhere, when world becomes hell overnight?
What? Hell overnight?
Well, I do have the power to prevent all of this from happening. But it seems God wants to give a hellish vibe to his creation for seven to ten years.
Are you saying that the Trials and Tribulations will last seven to ten years?
God will make them last longer, the longer it takes for people to take Us seriously.
God is a lunatic.
But We love him.
Link to App plz.
App.
Amen.
Humans are monkeys now.
- Elohim 🐇🦅
